i just thought the pic was cute - no, i don't have green hair! ha ha.

i've been learning alot lately through joel osteen and trying to let God use it in my life. one thing he taught about is how God does not let things happens to me but for me. he says that if we allow Him to, God plants seeds from events that happen in our life that we may think is a negative or too hard to overcome, God plants these as seeds to show His power and plan in our lives if we let Him.

it's hard but i'm trying. i guess cuz i cared alot for RMan and miss him alot. dumb as that may sound to someone on the outside. he just quit talking to me and as far as i knew, we had a good relationship. i always thought when you had a disagreement in a relationship, you didn't end the relationship - you talked it out. apparently he just walks away. so...i've given that to God and I know He has a plan and a purpose.

He knows my heart hurts and some days are better than others. I know my heart will heal and I will be better and stronger for it. And God has a different plan for me than I thought and that's okay, too. But the down days are really hard to get through, you know?